Sunday, October 28, 2007 { 4:18 PM }

i seriously don't understand what is he trying to do. he has plans for everyone and started off everything from nothing and till today i believe there is something that he has made.
five years ago, i made the decision to join this youth group called CORNERSTONES. I had no idea what it was, what will we do and who was the other people who is going to join it as well. Everyone's talking about it and discussing about it so might as well join it since my close friends would be joining it as well.
Together as a group we've done so many things together, camps after camps, sessions after sessions, so many beautiful memories that we've shared together, tears,laughters but of course true friends that i've made N of course the trust that we all have built together.
Ever since i've join sats, life is very boring for me. i was not able to spend more time with my beloved stones. I could not express my thoughts to them any longer. i feel very far away from them now. i feel very lost whenever i meet up with them. not saying this because feeling left out with them but its like so weird..maybe we've got no more common topic nowadays.
why am i feeling this way? sometimes i really feel that i'm laughing stock of the group. i can't be bothered anymore.
when i got sheila's msg that day, i got really upset and it got my thinking real hard. what's happening to us ? what was the real reason that he wan to disband us, everyone of us ?
i got very upset till that sunday when i heard the real reason why.
i don't really blame him now. maybe he has his own reason for doing such things. but i just didn't liked the way that he jus wanted to end it like tis!
whatever that is going to happen next, i am just goin to take it and not blaming anyone for it.
but to be honest
i can't bear to let this go like that .. really